"Mommy and Me"

I am looking at a mother, live on TV, that is on a campaign, indeed, she took out an ad in the New York Post and has, now, put up a website, to find a wife for her 31 year old grad. student son. Yea, I'm watching her on national television, being seriously interviewed by Ann Curry - well, as seriously as "news" ever gets on the Today show - they aren't treating it as a comedy piece or satire, which would be a nice change. Ann is being VERY supportive and affirming in her questioning of this mother and son. Yes, the son is there, too, sitting next to mom on the sofa. Mom is allowing him to speak a bit.
The thing that really astounds me about this situation is not the fact that a mother would think so highly of her son and the institute of marriage that she would long obsessively for his marital bliss...actually, I can't even imagine WHAT is going through this woman's mind. It's not that the son -the 31 year old son- has consented to this public display of his own gross inadequacies, and that he's allowed creepy "through-the-years-with-my-bestest-girl-MOM" photos to be aired for all the world to cringe at. What causes the hair on the back of my neck to stand on end, is that there are women out there that are actually responding, as I write this, to this woman's website!! Responding with the intention of dating this Mother's (momma's) boy!

If I were Ann Curry - or a reasonable facsimile - this is what I would ask.

"Mom, so your son is a grad. student? And, he doesn't appear to be grossly deformed in any way. Why do you think you have so little regard for and faith in your son's ability to attract and keep a girlfriend that you would even suggest humiliating him in this way?"
"What advice would you give to insure that sons grow into the kind of men that their own mothers can't conceive of their living fulfilling, productive lives without an arranged marriage?"
"Where will the three of you go on your first date?"
"After the marriage, Mom, where will you sleep?" "Really? I believe 60% of mothers that sleep in the same bed as their adult sons, choose the middle!"

"Son, WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? Just how long WERE you locked in that damp basement with no light, and only the occasional burning with lit cigarettes to break the monotony?"
"We hear that in addition to your doctoral degree you've also recently completed potty-training and are wearing big boy Elmo underoos?"
"Is it true that Mom will be your best-man for the wedding? And, that she'll accompany you and your lucky bride on the honeymoon to Dollywood!"

"Well, we certainly wish this narcissistic sociopath and her Oedipal complex son the best of luck!" "And, to all the women out there that have called and emailed, hoping for a chance to date this pair......RUN! "